Ideas note to self
June 2, 2025
Always wanted to make an animation of my sona, maybe I'll animate something to Wrong Bathroom by Tribe 8, I already drew something to it but I never did anything beyond that. Storyboards help, maybe I'll try that
Art is so tedious
June 2, 2025
8:30am|| Looking at other artists' works both inspires and infuriates me. Like, captainhowdie for example! I've been so obsessed with their art lately. The way he can just animate, make art, and fill out sketchbook pages all while making it look so effortless?? literally beyond me. I wish I could fill out sketchbooks that looks as cool as his. Plus, whenever I animate I run out of energy barely into the rough sketch phase
Off topic but tell me why someone threw a fucking carrot at me today bro
Anyways, maybe I'll make more art. I've been bullying myself nonstop cause I think my art isn't as cool as it could be. I mean I think my stylized style is good enough but I'm too lazy to make it cooler. My semi-realistic art can use some work but honestly I don't even feel like working on that, I'll get there when I get there
As much as I complain about working on my website I actually really love having my own space for self indulgent things, it's pretty cool.
9:09am|| Speaking of work I saw my old psysiology/anatomy teacher, Ms. Z, and I thanked her for believing in me. I updated her about getting my ADHD meds and antidepressants, I told her about my path to graduate high school, and I told her about how her class was like a safe space for me. She had a lot of concern for my wellbeing and I felt so seen by her. I'm actually tearing up a bit while typing this and I'm pretty sure I saw her tearing up as well. I hope she feels proud of herself and knows that her path as a teacher was the correct one.
Y'know I was always dogshit at doing work, art or not. School was particularly horrible for me. I have pretty severe ADHD so I pretty much didn't do any work that required extra time to complete. Weirdly enough, summer school always came easy. Anyways, since going on my meds (a pretty high dose for the medication) I've been doing pretty good. I've felt more productive too! It could be raised a bit though. I'm on 50mg right now and the highest goes to 70mg if I'm not mistaken. I'm gonna try to reach out to my old teachers somehow to thank them for their patience and tell them how I'm doing much better now
Coding sucks so bad
June 1, 2025
I've been coding for this fuckass website all day since I woke up and I swear to god I am going insane I hate coding so much but at least this looks kinda cool?
I should probably take a break from my screen. I don't even know if I took my meds today not gonna lie
On the phone with raeya and listening to music just to make the experience more bearable
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